Do you ever scroll though someone else’s blog or social media, and think ‘man, that’s an awesome ______ I wish I had that’ or ‘I wish I could do that’ or ‘they seem to have it all figured out’?
We all do, right? I know I do.
Some call this feeling FOMO (fear of missing out), and it turns out FOMO can be affecting your wellbeing.
A widely accepted rule in human psychology is that people have a tendency to view themselves in the best possible light: it’s called illusory superiority and, in healthy people, it can help boost self-efficacy, or the belief that we can successfully accomplish a task or perform well in a certain situation. But social media FOMO is disrupting that process and supporting an irrational belief that every one else’s social life is superior to our own. ~ Bustle
I’ve fallen into the trap of feeling less than, after viewing what I perceive is more than.
On The Flip-Side
But, I’ve also seen the flip-side of this. There is a director, at my job, who has an amazing life story. She served in the Air Force, receiving several accolades, she was a missionary who helped people in other countries, and she is now a director for a major fortune 500 company. I admit, I have often been jealous of her life story. What have I done with my life?
During a recent team building event in Epcot, I rode with her on Spaceship Earth. You know, the ride that is actually in the Epcot golf ball, that takes you on a journey through time?
We strapped ourselves in, the lights dimmed, and we started our journey. When we came upon an ancient civilization, she asked me, “omg, are those real people?” She was, of course, referring to the animatronic people, toiling the fields in the distance. And it made me laugh, on the inside of course, she’s many levels above me on the corporate ladder.
Then when we passed through the Renaissance, she looked up at Michelangelo painting the Sistine Chapel, and said “wow, I’ve always wanted to see that.” I told her it was amazing, and I’d seen it when I was nine.
Those two moments, sitting next to my director on Spaceship Earth, in Epcot, helped change my perspective. It helped me understand that I’ve done a lot of things in my life, sure I never made ranks in the military, and I’ve never been to Japan, but I have done a lot and seen a lot.
I have seen the Prague castle, and I’ve swam in the Pacific and Atlantic oceans. I’ve camped at the base of a 15,000 ft mountain in Colorado, and climbed it the next day. I gave birth to two amazing children. Like, seriously y’all, I created two lives with MY BODY!
Comparison to other people is fruitless, and it can really bring you down. I bet you can think of five things that you’ve done in your life that no one else you know has. Or things that you’ve done that you are proud of. AND I bet you can think of someone you envy, or look up to, and you can come up with at least two things that you’ve done that they haven’t, or that you’ve done better.
So what is FOMOtivation? I’ve decided that when I come across something that I like, or something that makes me question my situation or choices, I’m going to pin it to my FOMOtivation board, and I’m going to make it happen for myself. I actually already started when I was reading the most recent post on Kari’s blog and saw this picture of her kitchen.
I love the feeling I get from this photo. And I honestly thought to myself, “I wish my kitchen looked like that” though this may be a breakfast nook? And right then, I pinned it to my FOMOtivation board. When I hear myself saying “I wish”, I’m going to try to make it happen. Why the heck not?
Also a while ago I was reading Kath Eats Real Food and saw this mug on her desk (it’s the tenth photo down). I loved it, and after seeing it a few times and thinking about how I wished I had one, I went online and ordered it. Simple, right? I’m actually drinking out of that very mug, right now.
And I’m sure it won’t always work. I mean if one of my online friends gets a PhD, or is elected into the senate, I’m sure I won’t add those goals to my list of things to do. But you get my drift.